LAKELAND — For Maj. Cody Khork’s father and stepmother, the grief over his death has been salved by the effusions of sympathy and love.
“It’s recharged my belief in humanity,” James Khork said. “I’ve seen the good of the state, of the nation and our city. It’s uplifting to know there’s so many people who care, with deep beliefs and a lot of love.”
James and Stacey Khork spoke to media members in the Hollis Room at Florida Southern College before a celebration of life held April 22 in Annie Pfeiffer Chapel. The service took place 8½ weeks after Khork died March 1 during a drone attack on a military facility in Kuwait.
Khork, 35, had served in the U.S. Army Reserve since shortly after his graduation from Florida Southern in 2014.
More than eight weeks after Cody’s death, his father and stepmother described the continuing mixture of emotions they are enduring.
“You try to pull pride from your grief, and that’s probably the best emotion that you can do,” Stacey Khork said. “So it was very comforting to have that level of pride in the midst of this, considering we grieved in front of the nation.”
Stacey Khork said that she knew Cody had many friends, but she has still been surprised by the volume of people who have reached out to the family.
“I always said to him, I said, ‘Boy, you could make friends with the fencepost and invite the mailbox to dinner,’ because he just didn’t know a stranger,” she said. “He’d talk to anybody, and he always wanted everyone to feel included.”
James and Stacey Khork said they have been touched by the responses from Cody’s friends and military contacts.
“Very much so,” Stacey Khork said. “I mean, people that obviously we didn’t know, stories. We, for our own reference at the service, had a videographer, and we set them up so that people could go in and give interviews and give stories, because there are just too many for us (to collect). We want to know them all.”
“We’ve made new friends through Cody’s friends,” added James, a soft-spoken Marine Corps veteran. “It’s not like an old man-young man. It’s genuine friends. I went riding with a couple of his friends and socialized and did other things with them.”
The couple have made a custom of holding a video chat every Friday evening with one of Cody’s military mentors, whom they met after his death.
Meeting the president and VP
The military flew Khork’s remains to Lakeland Linder International Airport on March 18. Local residents lined roads around the airport to pay tribute as a hearse containing Khork’s coffin passed, and the procession wound through the Florida Southern campus on its way to Oak Ridge Funeral Home in Winter Haven.
James and Stacey Khork reflected on the experience of riding in the procession.
“It was amazing,” James Khork said. “I recognized a few people as we drove slowly through here and through town. … People were on the roads all the way through, unless it was in the woods.”
“We knew it was going to be big, but we never anticipated a crane holding a flag over every pass, an entire retirement community come out and stand with signs,” Stacey Khork said. “Little girls, little boys, children. It was so overwhelming. And then the display that Florida Southern did was just — I was like, ‘Y’all are going to have to drive faster. I’ll be a mess before we get to the funeral home.’”
The couple traveled to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware for the military transfer of Cody’s remains. They said that they met President Donald Trump and Vice President J.D. Vance, among many other government officials.
“I do like to relay the fact that every single person there, maybe minus a couple, were very genuine,” Stacey Khork said. “Some of them were crying before they even got to us. There was no rush. This was not a photo opp. This was generally people, including POTUS, that were sincere, took the time for us to talk to us.”
As much as they appreciate the expressions of support, James and Stacey Khork made it clear that nothing erases the grief they feel.
“We do day by day,” Stacey said. “It ebbs and flows. Certain things trigger; certain things you’re good with. Sometimes talking about him helps me; sometimes it doesn’t. So everyone has their own process to go through, and I think we’re trying to figure it out and be ever-present with each other, knowing, you know — today’s a good day. Well, OK. Today’s bad day. OK, not today.”
Gary White can be reached at gary.white@theledger.com or 863-802-7518. Follow on Twitter @garywhite13.
This article originally appeared on The Ledger: Parents of Maj. Cody Khork overwhelmed by expressions of sympathy
Reporting by Gary White, Lakeland Ledger / The Ledger
USA TODAY Network via Reuters Connect
