We live in a nation where tragedy happens with alarming regularity but the only reaction many of us can muster is a deep-seated anxiety as we wait to find out if the perpetrator was from “our side.” We collectively hold our breath until the monster’s affiliation is revealed, and then we give full throat to our visceral emotional reactions. We virtue signal when they come from the “opposition” and deflect when they are “one of us.”
We are a nation that uses the victims of atrocity as a weapon to wield against our foes and a shield to deflect from our own worst behavior. “Sure, your person was murdered, but where was the outcry when one of ours was victimized? Surely that slight justifies my callous attitude toward your loss.”
People who have lived in the same communities for years and raised their children together can no longer have pleasant conversations with one another. When they see their neighbors they no longer greet them with a warm smile but instead quickly turn away and pretend they never saw each other at best or exchange harsh words at worst.
Why?
We rage at the unfairness of our situations and prepare for the next time. We make the tragedy about ourselves. We make martyrs out of people we never met.
I know that there are people who honestly feel these losses deeply. They empathize with those left behind to pick up the pieces, but, sadly, more and more of us can’t stop ourselves from getting pulled deeper into the morass.
It is far past time to acknowledge that each victim and attacker is one of us. Not because of political party or identity, but simply by virtue of being human.
Every day, I look at the faces of the next generation of our nation and I see fear and antipathy. Fear because of the randomness of these acts of violence. Antipathy because they are all too common. A week or two from now, another attack will draw our attention for a moment then be lost to memory as we forge forward.
The only answer to violence is hope. If we truly believe in the value of life, we need to show it. Not through hollow words and catchy soundbites, but through concrete action.
We don’t have to be the fulcrum upon which the whole world will tilt. Our actions don’t need to make national headlines and stir the souls of millions. All we have to do is help one person.
Open a door. Smile at a stranger. Offer a sincere compliment to someone. Look beyond our differences to see the person beneath the label. Will this end the violence? No. But if we can brighten the life of someone else and put a little good into the world, isn’t that worth the effort?
Schuyler Snakenberg lives in southeast Iowa.
This article originally appeared on Des Moines Register: After violent tragedy, foster hope with a kind act | Opinion
Reporting by Schuyler Snakenberg / Des Moines Register
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