By Mark Pearson
Jeff Foxworthy has made a comfortable living as a comedian using a one-liner at the end of each sentence. He says that you just might be a … well you fill in the blanks. I came across a list of sentences that was written a long time ago. After I did a little editing and updating, I would like my readers to look at it so here goes.
If you believe that Donald Trump caused the spread of the coved virus by a lack of federal spending, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that a 4th-grade teacher is incapable of teaching students how to read and is somehow capable to teach them everything they need to know about sex, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that feminists who support women’s reproductive rights march in support of Hamas by carrying anti-Israeli signs and shouting anti-Semitic slogans. Who on October 7th committed mass murder by slaughtering women and their babies in the most horrific way imaginable, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more than a threat to us than nuclear weapons in the hands of Iran, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that global warming is caused by yuppies driving carbon-emitting SUV’S but that tree-hugging environmentalists who show up at summit meetings in their carbon-emitting Golf Stream 5s don’t’ you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that science is refutable and can be relied on but being LGBQRSTUV or any other letter in the alphabet or being transgender is normal, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that capital punishment for people who comment murder is inhuman but injecting saline into a womb or sucking a baby’s brains out just before it’s born isn’t, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that businesses create oppression but government creates prosperity, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that hunters don’t care about the environment but rioters like those who burned down half of Seattle during the “summer of love” somehow do, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to acquire it, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that the NRA is bad because they support certain parts of the constitution like the 2nd amendment but the ACLU is good because they support certain parts of the constitution like the 1st amendment supporting hate speech, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that when the government raises higher taxes it is good for our economy but ATM fees and interest rates on our credit cards are too high and are not good for the economy, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that Margret Sanger or Hillary Clinton are more important names in American History than Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Edison, or Robert E Lee, you just might be a Democrat
If you believe that standardized tests are racist and discriminatory but racial quotas aren’t, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that the only reason socialism and communism has not worked anywhere it has been tried throughout history is because it hasn’t been run by the right people, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that a president who kept practically all his promises gets accused of every malfeasance imaginable therefore should be thrown in jail but this current occupant who has all sorts of evidence brought against him and his whole family is still in office, you just might be a Democrat!
If you believe that transgender people in drag can be allowed to parade themselves in front of grade school children and have explicit pornographic material displayed in their library should be constitutionally protected but that manger scenes or other religious material should be outlawed, you just might be a Democrat!
I could go on but I think that you could come up with your own descriptions and examples that could be apropos and could be included in this list.
I hope that you enjoyed this and can still laugh even if it wasn’t so sad.