By Frank Bublitz
This is Frank Bublitz from Healthy Entertainment and Training. We just got through June, the month dedicated to raise awareness of veterans’ suicides. One way to help prevent suicides in all people is to learn how to do small talk with strangers. It’s fun to get to know a little bit about new people.
Simple friendly behavior could be lifesaving. Here’s an example.
One story that I hope I never forget was told to me by Kevin Hines. Mr. Hines was one of the only people to survive a jump from the Golden Gate Bridge.
Mr. Hines stated in an online presentation at one of Michigan’s Peer Support Specialist conferences that he rode a bus to the bridge. He said that for much of the ride he was sobbing loudly, with tears running down his cheeks.
He behaved the same way walking up toward the bridge.
He told us that no one spoke a word to him or asked a question to see what was going on. Worse than that, he stated, if someone had asked him what was going on he would have told them what he had planned to do.
We seem to have stopped showing interest in one another for some stupid reason. In honor of what Mr. Hines went through, I have been trying to spend time greeting and responding to people when I go about my day.
The simple word, “Hello”, and a sincerely meant “How are you?” is not only polite. It could be lifesaving.
Come to Terms with Yourself
Hello, this is Frank Bublitz with Healthy Entertainment and Training LLC. One of the hardest things for a performer, and a person to do is to stay within his limits.
We know what we’re going to say or sing, and how the resolution of every scene. So we are in a controlled environment trying to make it seem like random everyday life.
One of the hardest things to do in real life is to remember that we don’t have control over anyone else’s life. We can try to influence people’s behaviors and thoughts, but we do not have any ability to control them.
That is a hard lesson to remember when someone you care about takes his own life.
Shortly before a friend of mine committed suicide, I saw him being harassed by some so-called “Friends” of his when we were at work.
I knew that I should have said something to them, or something to him. But I was not able to do so. Not long after that I heard he had taken his own life.
For years I believed that I could have interrupted this event and saved my friend’s life.
One day I went to hear a speaker who had attempted suicide himself. He told those of us who were there to hear him to raise our hands if we felt guilty about not keeping someone from committing suicide.
Many of us, me included, did so. This man came to each one of us and asked us to repeat with him that “It is not my fault”.
I think I may even have believed that. But it is something, just like ordinary forgiveness, that must be practiced every day. But it is worth the effort.
Remember that you can only control you. And that only you can cause yourself to make good or bad choices in life. No one can make you do anything!
In these days of a world divided over multiple wars and social conflicts, people are excusing their lack of self-control and their awful acts. When I was a social worker beginning in 1980, we had been taught that no one could “incite” you to do anything. That everyone had a moral code. And it was his or her responsibility not to allow anything to force deviation from that code.
Like an evil, heartless real-life version of Flip Wilson’s The Devil Made me do it, people blame Donald Trump, Joe Biden. Israel, Hamas, Russia, and others for their terrorizing and abusing their fellow citizens. Even wishing death upon their own country while taking advantage of its benefits. This must stop! There is no excuse for giving control over to your emotions and letting your brain take second place. Stop. Set a boundary for yourself and do not cross it. Do not let someone else’s behavior determine your own.
That is only okay on stage or film.
