For now, at least, the clock has stopped ticking. I’m referring to the deadline for Iran to agree to a deal to reopen the Strait of Hormuz or, in President Donald Trump’s chilling words, “A whole civilization will die.”
As the clock was winding down, my wife and I couldn’t help but think of our daughter. “I’m so glad Bee is out of the Navy,” she said. Still, we can’t help but be afraid for other military families with so much uncertainty in the air.
Our second-oldest daughter, Nabihah, spent eight years in the service working as a helicopter mechanic. At one point, she considered making the Navy her career, but ultimately decided against it.
After two tours of duty — the last one at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic in March of 2020, under the first Trump Administration, she felt it was time to enjoy her life as a civilian. We could not be happier about her decision, especially with Trump’s apocalyptic threats.
Opinions regarding the status of the conflict vary. Some believe the U.S. achieved its goals, as Iran agreed to several concessions. Others argue Iran emerged with a significant strategic advantage. Both sides have agreed to a two-week ceasefire, but have accused the other of violating the terms with disagreements on what those terms even entail.
Under the Trump administration, you never really know what to believe. In his 2025 Inaugural address, he promised he “will stop all wars and bring a new spirit of unity to a world that has been angry, violent, and totally unpredictable.”
We see how that turned out.
We are glad our daughter is home, pray for military families
We empathize and pray for those in the military today, yet we can’t help but feel a sense of relief our daughter is in Seattle, safe and attending college.
She is handling all the challenges a 30-year-old single woman faces, including dating, high gas prices, rising rents, and inflation. Above all, we are grateful that she is safe, and we don’t have to worry about her losing her life in combat in Iran, especially when you consider the tone of Trump’s threats:
Since “Operation Epic Fury” began on Feb. 28, at least 13 U.S. military personnel have been killed, and between 200 and 370 have been wounded. These numbers are based on preliminary reports and information provided by U.S. Central Command.
Our daughter’s decision not to reenlist was influenced by several factors, not just her feelings about Trump. During her final years of service, she faced significant challenges. The isolation she experienced during the COVID-19 pandemic was particularly difficult. Months spent at sea without docking, far from the comforts of home, the racism she experienced while enlisted, along with the loss of crew members, left her both physically and emotionally drained.
Additionally, she encountered microaggressions as a Black woman, which added to her struggles. It was a lot to handle.
When it was time for her to reenlist, she felt proud of all she had accomplished, but ultimately decided that taking care of herself was the best choice.
Amid apocalyptic threats, silence from Republicans
What concerns me most about Trump’s threats is the relative silence from Republicans. Most of them avoid using the term “war,” despite Trump having done so on numerous occasions. Wisconsin Senator Ron Johnson did speak out regarding the threats, but his statement was only, “I hope and pray” that Trump is “using this as bluster.”
“I do not want to see us start blowing up civilian infrastructure…We are not at war with the Iranian people. We are trying to liberate them,” Johnson said Monday on the John Solomon Reports” podcast.
I have news for you, Sen. Johnson: I don’t want to see civilian infrastructure destroyed either, as attacking power plants and bridges is considered a war crime. Maybe you should tell the President that.
What-ifs for families with loved ones in service linger in your mind
Our families have a longstanding tradition of serving in the military.
My grandfather was a proud soldier during World War II, and my father served in the U.S. Army during the Korean War. Five of my uncles also wore Army uniforms, three of whom fought in the Vietnam War. This legacy of service continued with three of my cousins joining the Army. On my wife’s side, her grandfather served in the Army during the Korean War, her father also served in the Army, and two of her uncles did as well.
Despite their dedication, many of them were unable to benefit from the GI Bill like their White counterparts because of systemic racism and Jim Crow laws. They were denied low-interest mortgages, and in Mississippi, where most of my uncles live, VA offices often directed them away from education, training, and loans, which confined them to low-skilled jobs.
Despite these challenges, we knew that Bee dreamed of serving in the military. She participated in ROTC in high school, and we saw firsthand how that experience changed her life. When she went to boot camp in 2013, we felt a mix of emotions but were proud of her for committing to serve our country.
As parents, however, there were always lingering “what-ifs” in the back of our minds. During wartime, the “what-ifs” become even more frightening, since your main concern is your child’s safety.
We will keep praying for peace during these tough times and hope this war is truly over. Still, we sleep a little better at night knowing our daughter is home, but we understand that for other parents of children in the military, that clock is still ticking.
Reach James E. Causey at jcausey@jrn.com; follow him on X @jecausey
This article originally appeared on Milwaukee Journal Sentinel: We’re proud of daughter’s Navy service — and glad it’s over | Opinion
Reporting by James E. Causey, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel / Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
USA TODAY Network via Reuters Connect
