Dear Uncle Sam,
Just a quick note to congratulate you on your special day. I’ve not been the most attentive nephew, often forgetting to acknowledge the blessings of being part of the family you started these many decades ago. If I remember correctly, this is your BIG 2-5-0! So I wanted to join the family in paying tribute to you on reaching that milestone. I know it has not always been easy.
You’ve always been the “fun uncle,” putting on a big show everywhere you go, throwing your weight around. There’s never any doubt who is the center of attention when you are in the room, whether at the UN or the G-7. I can only imagine the ruckus you caused your elders in the Old Country when, on July 4, 1776, you, your ornery brothers, George W., Tom J., John A., and the other colonists declared you were serious about establishing your own new household. You informed King Grandpa George III that you were moving off the palace grounds. Cutting the British apron strings was bloody costly, but you persevered. I offer my belated thanks.
I know from the history books that growing up has not been easy either. Figuring out how to deal with the issue of “families within the family” has been most difficult and continues to be only imperfectly resolved. One of your old nemeses, Mr. Tecumseh, appears nightly each summer at Sugarloaf Mountain, a few miles from where I write, to remind us that your plan to “assimilate” the Native Americans, although ultimately completed, exacted a heavy toll from those who occupied this territory before it became the New Country. And it took another war, this one between our Northern kinfolk and our Southern kinfolk, to determine whether the federal government or the individual state governments get to decide who is a citizen.
Again, I write this while sitting in Chillicothe, the capital of the old Northwest Territory, where it was determined in 1787, (nine years after your birth), that no involuntary servitude would be allowed in the states to be carved from that territory, including Ohio.
The majority segment of our family, women, did not come into full citizenship until 1920, when the 19th Amendment was ratified, giving them the right to vote. You were 144 years old by then, and I’m sure Aunt Samantha has never let you forget this glaring oversight.
Samuel, besides these serious intra-family squabbles, our American family has encountered deadly threats from outsiders. I’ve read about World War I, the war to end all wars that definitely didn’t. WWII ended just before my birth, but I have interacted with enough of its veterans to know that the very existence of our nation was being put in doubt.
“All hands on deck” were required to save it. Subsequently, regrettably, our national family has been involved in what seems an unending series of conflicts, all seemingly essential at the time, but many, upon reflection, having doubtful rationales.
Whether the cause was wise or dumb, essential or unnecessary, when the poster said: “Uncle Sam Wants You,” brave men and women have always stepped forward to defend the family name. I give them all my heartfelt salute. I am unworthy to polish their boots.
On a more positive note, Sam Man, our family has plenty to be proud of on your special day. Throughout all your days and even now, inventions and advances in every field of endeavor from agriculture to astronomy, medicine to megabytes, have bubbled up from our citizens’ imagination and ingenuity.
Mr. Sam, I needn’t inform you that all is not right in the family right now. We aren’t working together as well as we once did. I realize that we have always had our divisions. One branch of the family gets crosswise with another and stops cooperating or even communicating with the other for a while, but this disturbing tendency of late seems different. I’m starting to sense too much of the Hatfields and McCoys mindset: “If you disagree with me, you are worthless.” Please do what you can to get us all working together again for the family good. Maybe the whole family could go to church together some Sunday.
You have now lived one-fourth of 1,000 years. Some folks think you won’t last much longer. I’ll admit…there are days lately when you’ve not appeared to have much of a future. But as in Mark Twain’s famous self-assessment: “The rumors of your death have been greatly exaggerated.” After all, the classical Greek civilization endured for around 1,100 years. Parts of the Roman Empire lasted 1,500 years. Compared with those numbers, you are a mere teenager, Sam.Uncle, in 1976 I enjoyed attending your 200th bash and now this one, but I’ll miss your 300th in 2076. Nevertheless, I want you to persist by clinging to the principles and actions that have led to our American family’s success. I want my grandkids and their generation to attend that celebration with hands joined and heads held high.
Gratefully yours,
Nephew Richard Delong
This article originally appeared on Chillicothe Gazette: Opinion: An open letter to Uncle Sam for America’s big 2-5-0
Reporting by Richard Delong, Special to the Gazette / Chillicothe Gazette
USA TODAY Network via Reuters Connect
By Richard Delong, Special to the Gazette | USA TODAY Network
